Let It Begin With Me

When I was a darling little girl my mommy used to sing songs to or, as we got older, with us whenever we were in the car. She knew hundreds of songs and taught them all to us kids.

(Pang: This was before she became so sick with Alzheimer's that there was none of her personality or her incredible intelligence left. Before Alzheimer's stole my mom - one brain cell at a time.)

We traveled quite a bit in those days, or so it seemed. We lived out in the country and had to drive to town for supplies, company, etc. Enough of this background. One of the songs we sang said: "Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me." Perhaps you know it.

When I got into recovery from substance abuse, my sponsor didn't sing the song, but she was serious about keeping me focused on my "side of the street". What that means is that if I'm paying attention to my own shortcomings, and maybe even attempting to refrain from practicing these defects of character, I won't have any time left over to judge others. (Where is the fun in that?, I thought but, wisely, didn't say.) She said that if I wanted the rest of the world to shape up and act right I ought to lead by example. Something about walking the walking the walk, instead of talking the talk. If I felt certain behaviors were unbecoming, then I'd better get busy making sure I didn't behave that way.

Because I want to stay clean and sober, I follow my sponsor's suggestions. What I discovered was that working on curbing my own flaws was a full time job! And I needed to spend time on building and maintaining a connection with my Higher Power (aka- the old HP). Plus, I had to replace my poor behavior with new and improved ways of dealing with life. All this work didn't fall under any labor laws which meant that there were no coffee breaks or days off. This is a 24/7 commitment!

Like most Americans, I would like there to be peace in this and in all countries. No matter how fighting a war turns out, I don't believe there is victory in war. The price is too high, and I'm not thinking about just the financial aspect.

I still live out in the country so I'm in the car quite a bit. Frequently, I find myself humming one of those songs from my childhood. On this particular day, I was enjoying "Let there be peace on Earth and let it begin with me..." and some idiot cut me off. I started mumbling things like: "Someone ought to teach that fool how to drive..., Where is a cop when you need one?, I ought to speed up and cut him off and see how he likes it..."

The thought came: Do your sentiments match those of a person who truly seeks world peace?

Dang. A peaceful person probably doesn't scream obscenities at another for making a mistake. There's the old HP, showing up just in time to nudge me back to my own side of the street. Again.

Have a good and sober day.