Nagging

I saw a little video of South Park on YouTube once called 'Naggers' and this is not related to that at all. Actually, this post is something rather personal about nagging experiences I've had.

I have a way with words. Whether it be the written word or the spoken word I have the ability to paint pictures with words. This isn't bragging, it is just a fact. It is one of the gifts given to me by God and I've had this ability for as long as I can remember. Using this gift to make others laugh has been my favorite way to use this. Very seldom have I ever written or given a talk for any serious occasion or intent. I have submitted articles to magazines and newspapers periodically and many of these articles were published, but almost always anonymously.

The past few years, as I've gotten older, I've become more interested in developing a stronger spiritual bond with my Creator. That happens to many of us, I suppose. As the end of our lives grows ever closer, thoughts about what happens next and the possibility of meeting our Creator do tend to capture our attention. Anyway, I've been struggling to get to know the Guy with whom I'm hoping to spend eternity. I've also been asking God what His will for me is and to help me do His will throughout the day. I believe that He wants me to write about my struggles with developing a stronger spiritual life.

I have no formal training in writing or composition. Nor do I know much about grammar. I think a dangling participle sounds like an indication that one needs a bath and I have no idea what it really means. Naturally, I've resisted doing what God wants me to do because of these truths. I did write a few things about my recovery from addiction and people tell me they have found them very useful and I'm delighted by that, but I haven't made a real effort to do what God wants me to do. Until now.

The few things I've written were basically to appease God and, hopefully, get Him to stop nagging me about it. But nobody nags like God. Have you ever noticed this? Think about it. When God wants you to do something for Him, He's relentless! You can't get away from Him. You can't leave. You can't hang up on Him. You can't shut the door on Him. And if you manage to stop the thought from banging around in your brain, He has other people start in about it. There truly is no escape. You might even dream about whatever it is that God wants you to do (I feel this is especially uncalled for). Eventually, you just give in and do it out of self defense; you simply can't take it any more.

Which is where I'm at today. I have capitulated, surrendered, conceded, knuckled under and whatever else you want to call it and started writing. I have made the commitment to write about my spiritual development. My journey is not very reverent and definitely not religious but it is my journey which is what I believe I've been asked to do. Starting today.

Have a good and sober day.