Life and Death

I really hate the disease of addiction. This week alone has had 2 deaths from alcoholism/addiction. One was a friend that I grew up with; she never made it into a recovery program, ETA or otherwise, that I knew about. The other was a friend I met in ETA meetings. She was not able to stay clean and sober, though she tried.

Some people would say that the 12 step recovery program ETA, or any recovery program for that matter, doesn't work. They would be correct. The 12 steps are made of words and words don't do much work as a rule. They decorate paper or fill the air with sound but they don't work. The work comes by taking action. Honesty, Open mindedness and Willingness are the three components of recovery and they are indispensable.

Does this mean the women who died were liars, closed minded or unwilling? I don't think so. I think it means that the disease of addiction was particularly strong in them. Diseases kill people everyday. Some people are able to beat the diseases that claim them and some people are defeated by them. That is true about cancer, heart disease, diabetes, pneumonia, influenza and many other diseases.

The sense of loss and sadness are the same no matter what someone dies from.

Another friend in the recovery program ETA is being buried this afternoon. After several attempts, he was able to maintain sobriety for decades. He used to anger me with his ability to be honest. In other words, he told me the truth and, in doing so, he helped me stay sober. I will miss him, too.

We alcoholics and drug addicts abuse our bodies and, sooner or later, we pay for that abuse. All serious illnesses take a toll on our bodies, not just addiction. Vices such as smoking, poor diet, caffeine, anger, anxiety, lack of exercise or too much exercise put stress on our bodies and, eventually, that bill comes due.

Yeah, yeah, we are all going to die. I know that. But since getting clean and sober, working a recovery program and discovering the old HP, I'm no longer so disillusioned with this life here on Earth that ending it is the only thing I have to look forward to.

I cannot stay clean and sober by myself. I've proven that. Today I know that I have all of the people in recovery that will help me. I need each one of them. It's a matter of life and death.

Have a good and sober day.