"Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol." This quote is from the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, by William Silkworth, M.D., who spent many years working with those suffering with drug and alcohol addiction. (One may be forgiven for thinking this is the result of a long and expensive government study but, despite the 'Duh' factor, this was not the case.) Let's face it, booze tastes like what I imagine the slop coming out of the bottom of a dumpster would taste like. Thank heavens I don't know for sure. The people who claim to like the taste are either liars or have numb-tongue syndrome.
Oddly enough, I find that I often like the effect produced by doing something I don't particularly enjoy doing. This observation came to me last night after a gathering of ETA members. We were talking about goals; how to set achievable goals, what steps you take to reach them, whether or not the old HP wants to tag along, etc.
One of the women there, Midge, said that her goal was to be happy. Sounds good to me; I like happy. But then Barbie, being the practical sort (boo hiss), jerked us all out of the fantasies about living in total happiness by saying, "That is not a measurable goal. Goals must be specific and measurable."
We all turned to frown at Barbie. What a party pooper! After a few moments, Midge snapped out, "Fine! I want to be happy today! That's measurable." Go, Midge! Take that, Miss Barbie Smarty Pants!
"Your goal is still not able to be measured." What a load of horse droppings! 'Today' is a specific amount of time and can be measured. Have you ever heard of a watch? Barbie followed up with, "What is happiness for you? If you don't determine the things that make you happy, you will never get there or you won't recognize when you do get there. Happiness, like sobriety, isn't a destination; it is a journey. Happiness is a byproduct of the actions you take and the decisions you make." Hmmm.
On the way home, I was thinking this over and Dr. Silkworth's quote came to mind. I don't like discipline, but I like the effect; freedom through discipline. I don't like responsibility, but I like the effect of contentment that comes with meeting my responsibilities. I don't like biting my tongue, but I like not making amends. I don't like admitting my wrongs to others, but I like the effect of relief that I get when I do so.
I'm thinking of re-writing that quote: I do the will of the old HP essentially because I like the effect produced by living clean and sober. Talk about a 'Duh' factor...
Have a good and sober day.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Just came from a meeting where the topic was daily actions. And what I shared was that the things I've done daily were at first "fake it til you make it" inspired. I like the high and the body buzz that comes from doing what I enjoy, but I'm an alcoholic so obviously that is dangerous.
ReplyDeleteBut when I started working the program of ETA, there wasn't much I did because it felt good. And to top it off I was being told to do stuff I'd never done before! Gasp! How could I know if I'd like the effect??
What I know is that I've tried other ways to be clean and sober...to be at peace and they didn't work. So here I am doing this ETA stuff because I see the effect it's had on others.
Actually I do like the effect now when I work at my recovery. But I forget easily so it's a good thing that my sponsor has me doing things for my recovery on a regular basis.
Happiness is a journey for sure. I work at this each day. Some days are more difficult. But choosing happiness is much better than choosing misery.
ReplyDelete