What Does The Old HP Want From Me?

For the past several years, the old HP has been nagging me to write. I've known for quite a while that the old HP has given me a gift with words. After being in the recovery program ETA, I came to the realization that true humility is not denying our gifts, it is more about giving thanks to the Guy who gave us those gifts. It is also knowing that, by accepting His gifts, we also accept a responsibility to use our gifts to benefit our fellow man. I've written a few articles about recovery that have been published, yet I get the feeling the old HP wants more from me. The trouble is that I haven't known what to do with what I write.

I had asked the old HP to heal, either physically or spiritually, a family member. The response I got was: "I've wanted something from you for a very long time yet you haven't done what I've asked." This would be true. "You do your part, and I'll do Mine." Fair enough, except I had no idea how to proceed and couldn't see the point of writing and letting the words sit in the drawer or in the computer. Someone suggested that I start a blog and post my writings that way, and that is obviously what I did. I also cut a deal with the old HP: I would write every weekday (and post it) for six months and, at the end of that six months, He would show me what my next step was to be.

Now, this might come as a surprise to some of you, this wasn't the first time I'd attempted to bargain with the old HP. However, it was the first time I followed through and done what I said I would do. The six months ended this past July. I still don't know what my next step is to be. I can certainly understand the old HP thinking that turn about is fair play. I've reneged on the deal too many times to count before. Having no idea what the old HP wants from me, the inner voice that had been urging me to write has gone silent. I figured that meant I had already written what the old HP needed from me. I've written sporadically since then, but the commitment has been met.

Now, I'm getting a few messages that ask what has happened to the blog, if I'm ever going to write regularly again, why I stopped and is the blog accessible some new way since new postings can't be found. This brings me to you, my readers. Knowing that the old HP often speaks through other people, and since I'm getting no clear direction from Him, would those of you who read my blog give me your opinion? This is the only way I know of to help me recognize the next right thing so that I can do the next right thing. Please leave a comment, if possible, or email sobernotsomber@hotmail.com. Thanks!

Have a good and sober day.